You get yourself involved in international organisations, and research bodies, that are trying to globally promote small scale ecologically conscious farming.
And then, as a result, you're asked to travel abroad to represent your group.
Of course its very nice, yes even flattering to be asked to take part.
Who doesn't like to feel their opinions, and contributions are valued?
But taking up the offer of an expenses paid trip to Nicaragua, to summit with other like minded folk, would most likely involve hopping on a plane.
But darn it, if I don't fly for ecological reasons.
(I've taken one flight short- haul in the last 23 years)
It might be possible to get there by cargo ship, and train - now wouldn't that be something to write home about... .
But the whole thing, done that way, would probably take the best part of a month.
And I'm not totally convinced that such an idea would go down so well, even in relatively quiet November...
What would the chickens have to say about it??
Most opinions canvassed re the proposed trip, have resulted in versions of : -
" Go, go, go girl, you only live once"
"What an opportunity, you'd be crazy not to take it.
" If you don't make use of that opportunity, then someone else will burn that aviation fuel on your behalf"
" Nicaragua is a beautiful, fascinating country, and the people are lovely, you'll get so much out of it"
Yes well, I know all that.
And plenty more besides.
Plus I do also know, that it makes, not one tiny infinitesimal, particle of a jot, of difference to any 'saving the planet' malarkey if I go, or not.
But dropping a principal the first time a seriously tempting offer is dangled?
How does that sit, with the 'internal ethics committee?
It really isn't the potential 'crowing' that might emanate from some quarters..
I've done enough work, over the last few years, to realise that the most important judge, and decider of my behaviour is me*
Other peoples opinions are interesting, and worth listening to, for sure, but when all is said, and done, their thoughts belong to them.
"Judge not, lest yea be judged" and so forth.
(*not having a convenient deity to do the judgement sitting on my behalf)
But could the benefits to 'the cause' (and to me) outweigh the carbon load?
I guess, if I cycled everywhere, for the rest of my life , that could just about make amends...
But doing that, would be cheating in a way, because in truth I'd probably prefer to cycle everywhere. So that would just make other peoples lives awkward.
I suppose most decisions of this sort (and how incredibly lucky to have this kind of 'first world dilemma' thrust upon) hinge on how will it feel, in a year or fives, time?
Will I be forever kicking myself for taking such a moral, yet ultimately lacking-in-consequences stand.
It all needs careful consideration. much pondering.
Thankfully small farming gives ample opportunity for that. consulting with birds and talking to cucumber plants.
Moreover, if one chooses not to go, but keeps quiet about it - then what has been gained?
It's like boycotting Nestle products, but not bothering to tell them...
Errr, I don't think they're going to notice that you as an individual didn't buy their stuff.
If I opt out, but do make that fact known, will I be guilty of committing the fairly newly minted crime of 'virtue signalling'?
Which I believe roughly translates as - being 'well behaved' in the name of some greater cause, but feeling obliged to annoy other people about the fact that you've done that...
Hmmn - there's really not much wiggle room here is there?
Something along these lines of self imposed torturing, has arisen before... Its just that it's my turn to be tempted now....