The famer dharma

 When I first started up the veg box scheme about seventeen years ago round about 2003

 I had already been teaching yoga locally for about five years or so.

I'd put posters up in the old pre-internet style, giving contact details for anyone wishing to book in.

 So I'd get land line calls, asking about the details and nature of the classes.

And then - after a short while discussing the potential delights and benefits of Iyengar Yoga 

 I'd quite often get a tentative inquiry - 

"Umm you wouldn't happen to be the same 'Ruth' who does our veg box would you ??"

"Err yes actually -  'fraid so - that's me also..."

For some reason, i was a bit worried at being seen as a Jill of all trades - mistress of none perhaps ??

Which it turns out - is very probably the case -

In fact i don't actually think i'm the best ever  teacher - Nor do i expect to be.

- Neither for that matter, am i the most amazing grower of vegetables.

But I did eventually come to realise, after the usual years and years of imposter syndrome that plagues many of us. 

 That I am more than perfectly adequately OK at both - which is plenty enough.

 And that - in many ways - the doing of one - informs the better practice of the other.

Possibly I'm a better Yoga teacher for being a practical worker in the 'real world' - who understands the stress and strain, both physical and mental, of 'normal' everyday life -

 - Of having to get stuff done just because it must be done  - run a business - tackle all the problems of trying to be a 'good enough' farmer in the twenty first century.

Considering the needs of the farm, the crops, ecology, finances, workers and the community the farm nourishes.

It could be said to keep me grounded.

Meanwhile, practicing and teaching yoga requires a different sort of physical and mental discipline - alongside an ability to communicate and engage.

Happily all that strength, flexibility, and breath work, prevents me from being too badly broken physically mentally (and financially at times) by the farming.

So most of the time it's a positive feedback loop.

Within certain boundaries - There needs to be a degree moderation in all these complexities -

It can on occasion feel as if its all becoming almost overwhelmingly entangled - 

Theres 'being integrated' and then theres being caught up in something so very 'enmeshed' that it feels almost inescapable ..

And for someone who also requires a bit of space, time, and freedom to do other things, and pursue other interests - that needs keeping an eye on as well..

Its all too easy to overdo it - which is something I'm still learning to manage - but its getting better.

Hence the Farmer Dharma .

Doing earthculture as Yoga.

Doing Yoga as earthculture

Finding a balance in both these things.

But then, beyond all that, a balance in turn with all the other essential parts of life - 

Maintaining relationships, social life, political engagement, pure unadulterated fun, fulfilling pleasures, rest even. 

That last one seems a bit tricky for those of us who seem to be forever running towards, or away (?) from things.. 

Living and experiencing life with understanding, creativity, awareness and acceptance.

So of course - that requires a full understanding, and acceptance of the realities of the natural world -

Not just the fluffy loveliness of blossoming hedgerows, a well grown tomato, blue skies and seas, birdsong, and the joy of high mountain peaks - 

- But in addition to that - the less pleasant realities of physical hardship, persistent working, not giving up - feeling sad and low about stuff - times being difficult - and all the inevitable change decay, disease, and eventual death.

How to build a life that recognises and encompasses all these things, without compromising oneself, or anyone else beyond reasonable limits ??

This all needs further exploration with words and pictures i think ..

A regular posting, throughout the seasons .